From Resources to Relationships: Shifting Your Mindset in Partnering with Parents

When most ministry leaders talk about equipping parents, they usually mean one thing: providing resources. And while there’s nothing wrong with handing out resources (we love a good family resource here at Deeper KidMin), if our strategy for partnering with parents stops there, we’re missing the bigger picture.

Equipping parents is more than just distributing resources. If our only strategy for engaging families is giving them materials (that don’t even make it into the house half the time), we’ve slipped into what I call a “vending machine mindset.”

In a vending machine mindset…

• The children’s ministry leader simply provides resources with little interaction.
• Parents are expected to come to us: our buildings, our events, our parent resource shelves.
• Families may not know how to use what we’ve provided (or may not even realize the resources are available).
• There’s little personalization or ongoing support for individual family needs.

Now, resources themselves aren’t the problem. Parent resource walls and take-home tools can be great if families actually know how to use them. But if we’re just putting things out there and calling it “partnering with parents,” we’ve fallen short. Because here’s the truth: you don’t find a nourishing meal from a vending machine, and you won’t find an effective parent partnership there either.

Instead, what if we shifted to a “meal kit mindset”?

Think about meal kits like Hello Fresh or Blue Apron. They don’t just hand you random food items; they deliver a curated, clear, and convenient experience designed to fit into your real life. That’s the kind of shift our ministries need to make when it comes to partnering with parents.

(Psst – since I’m writing a book on this very topic, I’d love your input! I’ve put together a short survey about partnering with parents, and your answers will help shape not only my research but also the practical strategies I share with leaders like you. Would you take a few minutes to share your thoughts? Click here to fill out the survey!)

In a meal kit mindset…

• Resources are delivered to parents where they already are: at home, online, or in their daily rhythms.
• Materials are simple, clear, and easy to use, with instructions and support baked right in.
• The goal is to make family discipleship easier, not heavier.
• Leaders take time to personalize, build relationships, and offer ongoing encouragement.
• Families feel equipped and supported in a way that actually works for their unique schedules and needs.

This shift requires us to stop thinking about equipping parents as handing out resources and start thinking of it as a relational partnership.

That’s what I’ll be diving into in my upcoming online workshop, From Frustration to Fruitfulness: Partnering with Today’s Parents. If you’re ready to move beyond vending machine ministry and adopt a meal kit mindset, join me for this practical, research-backed 90-minute workshop. Together, we’ll explore what today’s parents really need, how to adjust your strategy, and how to create a parent partnership that works. And if you can’t attend live, no worries! Your registration includes access to the replay. Learn more about the workshop and sign up here.